What To Do To Tourons?

Tourons are moron tourists (Darwin Award winners). These people try to pet bison, jump over barriers, throw rocks at visitors below, ignore high surf warnings and so on. The list is almost endless and each day more stories show up.

Some states are posting signs that they will not perform rescues. Some say they will charge the tourons for the cost of recovery and so on.

What are your suggestions?

Mine is when you arrest a touron, you require them to supply their primary email account. Then you create an account on their behalf at Temu :slight_smile:

Heh, great term.

Be thankful you have the problem.

I was born and raised in a tourist destination and later in life spent almost three decades in Alaska. As a kid in Ft. Lauderale, FL I remember my dad cussing about the stupid tourists who slowed traffic and ask silly questions. In Alaska I watched tourists watching bears from 40 feet away, unsupervised or accompanied by a knowledgeable guide, and totally oblivious of the fact that the cute cuddly bear could, in just a few seconds, cover that 40 feet and attack and kill them. Many people, when venturing out of their element, do stupid things. It’s what humans do.

But HI, FL and AK all benefit a lot from tourism, just look at visiting tourists from the point of view that they pay some of the taxes you would otherwise be paying. For HI it’s 25% of the total economy.

Contenders for winning the Darwin Award, lol.

Arizona has the Stupid Motorist Law, which, where you cross signs that say “Do Not Enter When Water is Present,” or cross barricades, and then get swept away and have to be rescued get charged the full cost of the rescue, which is many thousands of dollars.

We also close hiking trails when it reaches a certain degree…not sure what it is for humans; for dogs it’s 100 degrees. And almost no tourist tales even a fraction of the water they need…

I posted this more as a revenge against tourons, you know like pouring attactant on them and sending them into the wild animal areas, but the thread will go where it does. :slight_smile:

A couple of events have led me to want to reply to iudiot tourists. For example:

I give tours at a famous historic church in a rural are. Those who have visited the Big ISland may know that the Painted Church is not a busy place. Anyway, I welcome the tourists and inevetably get asked “Do you live here?”. I guess that they may mean to ask if I am the priest (even you Clarkies know THAT must be far from true), but I think they really mean “Do you live on island or do you commute…” I guess from California or maybe Georgia? I mean, I am wearing shorts and a T Shirt, not the typical garb of a Roman Catholic priest…

Over on Maui a tourist asked the concierge “What time do the whales come by?”. I guess they could have meant what part of the year, but if I was the concierge I would just say “about 10:30” and walk away :slight_smile:

We do get the sad events here too. Just the other day a tourist jumped from the cliff at the southernmost point of the U.S. into the water below. " 24-year-old visitor dies after being swept out to sea, possibly drowning in waters off South Point". It is a high cliff. If you look at a map of the world, centered at the southern tip of the island, you can imagine that except for a small angle to the north which leads to land, your next destination is open sea for thousands of miles. Finding a person even a few minutes after jumping is quite difficult.

We have had people throw trash into liquid lava to see what happens, not understanding how sacreligous that is to Hawaiians. It would be like taking a pew from a church and burning it for a bonfire.

Tourists, you love their spending, just not all of their spending time.

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Maybe google maps should delete the “South Point Cliff Dive” tourist attraction?

The reason they come to your island is to have a new experience. Of the 8 billion people on this earth no two of them are exactly alike, we are all different from one another because those experiences and the lessons we learned from them are not the same. Add to that the fact that people’s learning styles differ from each other and you realize that when speaking to an audience you will fail to communicate with some, if not many of them. Q & A time gives you a chance to include some that missed it on your first attempt.

A case in point; When we spend time on the tiny South Pacific island of Mauke, my wife walks around the 10.2 mile perimeter each morning before breakfast. On our second visit one of the locals ask her why she was not afraid to do so all by herself. My wife replied “I’m not afraid, should I be?” He said “YES!.. there are spirits in the trees and they may lure you into the jungle and harm you.”

His concern was genuine and he was incredulous when my wife said she was not afraid of the spirits. He was also surprised to hear that her real concern, when he first asked her the question, was that another person might harm her. His reaction to that possibility was the sme as my wife’s was to the danger from evil forest spirits.

There’s no such thing as a stupid question from an earnest learner…

Navigation systems suggest people drive down the boat ramp into the water here.

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LOVE the Temu idea… HA!